Help! I feel sexually abandoned

feature 1, frustration, human behavior, human interest, human sexuality, life, lori buckley, love, love life, sex, sex education, sex life, sex therapist, sexual, sexual activity, sexual frustration, sexual intercourse, sparks - By Better Sex on Monday, September 6, 2010 - 11:38

Question:I am a 33 year old sexually frustrated man. My girlfriend and I live together with our 3 year old, but our sex life has no life any more. Can you tell me how to can get the spark back in the bed room?

Thanks,
DB

Dr. Lori's Answer: It’s not uncommon for sexual activity to decline after the birth of a child. Parenting is hard work.

Also, keep in mind that some women feel insecure about their bodies after giving birth. It’s probably time to take your girlfriend to a nice dinner and a hotel where she can feel like a woman and take a break from being a mom.

You might also want to try some of the things you used to do to seduce her at the beginning of the relationship. Kisses on the neck, flowers, and phone calls to tell her you love her can work wonders. And changing a diaper or two couldn’t hurt.

To get the spark back, start slowly and spend a lot of time giving your partner pleasure without the pressure to reciprocate or have intercourse.

Watch a better sex video together to get some new ideas. Then try adding a fantasy or adult sex toy into your sex play. Your girlfriend will soon be wanting sex as much as you do.

Dr. Lori Buckley is a licensed clinical psychologist and an American Association of Sex Educators, Counselors, and Therapists (AASECT) certified sex therapist. We know that there are a lot of people who have questions about all kinds of sexual things, so we teamed up with Dr. Lori to answer your questions.